if the world should end

The Mayan Apocalypse.  12-21-12.  Yikes!  The general consensus is that it's not happening, but that hasn't stopped people from stalking the mountain tops in France waiting for the UFOs to rescue them, buying candles en masse, and scheduling End of the World parties.  I'm basically a non-believer, but this awful rainstorm we're getting in the Ace Deuce right now has me ever so slightly worried, just in case that movie 2012 was right and we DO need to be piling onto the arks...which are in China.  Since I'm obviously not making it over there in time, I've got less than a day to start living to the fullest.  Here's my Last Day On Earth List:

1. Use the Mayan Apocalypse to jump back on the blogging horse.  I've been writing a lot and then get stuck pulling the trigger on the "publish" button.  "No more!" I say.  You'll be stuck with my random thoughts and drawings whether they're witty or not.
2. This might be a cliché, but people say this for a reason:  I'd call everyone who I love (and go see anyone close enough in person), and tell them I love them.  Then I'd throw away my phone.
3. Stop saying sorry.  My habit of gratuitous apologizing has reached new levels recently.  I am NOT sorry you have indigestion, as I did not cause it.  I am NOT sorry that you elbowed me at soccer.  Sorry I'm not sorry for not being sorry?
4. Go for a hard, fast run, because it's something that makes me feel alive.  (So does waterfall jumping, but there aren't any waterfalls close enough).
5. Stock up on canned goods.  I know that the kind of apocalypse people are talking about won't be the kind for which bottled water and canned beans would be useful.  But what if ... the Mayans were predicting the Zombie Apocalypse?  I need canned food, good running shoes, a backpack, a machete, and some water proof mascara (I'll be the best looking zombie survivor ever!) STAT.  At any rate, I'll actually have canned goods in the kitchen, which would be its own kind of apocalypse in a way.
6. Blast "Don't Rain On My Parade" on repeat for a good 20-30 minutes. 
7. Ignore the End of the World emails that are flooding my inbox.  No, Spirit.  I will not be booking a cheap flight.  And I hear OKCupid is encouraging its users to "Go out with a BANG," if you get my drift.  Delete delete delete!!
8. Watch Dirty Dancing.  And then turn on Crazy Stupid Love, but only watch the Ryan Gosling parts--particularly the shirtless scenes.  
9. Put on the beautiful, unworn cocktail dress hanging in my closet and await the end gracefully, peacefully, and in style. 

All that said, it doesn't seem that the world will be ending.  I'm not sure if the world is ending at midnight tonight, midnight tomorrow, or 5:11 AM tomorrow, but it's already 9:35 AM on Friday 21 in New Zealand, so I'm gonna go ahead and call a big bluff on those Mayans. 

Dear Mayans,
Stick to the brain surgeries with rocks as utensils, and leave Doomsday predictions to Harold Camping.